Hopscotch Streets

In the summers
I think of you
And the magic we strung
Like sparkling beads
Memories piling up
Like clay swirls into a saucer

We took plain days
That could've stayed gray
And splattered them
In a manner
More extraordinary
Than anything I've ever seen

Music circled our souls
In cavernous concert halls
With roaring orchestras
Or on your patchwork quilt
As we sat side by side
Singing old lullabies
Shimmering and
Faded like your
Soft, plaid shirts

We walked hopscotch streets
Not far from the ocean
Skipping over secret lawns
To dance together
Under church and steeple and
Lights that twinkled as
My heart was breathless
Never before have I experienced
Anything like
The night we walked
Quietly to your secret hideout
Warming our hands by
The crackly fire
Beneath salty sea air

I sang you the words
To my favorite song
And you smiled;
So comfortable were we
Side by side
I can't say that I've ever
Tasted the magic of summer
As fully as I did you with you,
With strawberry ice cream
With triangle watermelon
On sprawling lawns
Between art that whispered
At mysterious museums
And
You and me
On the hopscotch streets
A perfect picture,
Packed up in my
Dusty memory.

Checkmate.

How do I let go
Of someone like you?
Someone who stood out,
Planets and stars and
Dazzling comets above
Anyone else who's
Ever come close
To touching this heart
It was effortless to you;
A memorized maze
An expert at this game
I've never seen anyone call out,
"Checkmate,"
As quickly as you did.
I'm frightened as you're far away and
I've pushed you out
To a deep, black sea
I just hope,
I hope that someone else
Can cast magic and tell stories and
Hold my heart so softly in his hands as
You did
You,
Who called me honest,
And who stayed up late with me
One winter night
As I fell blindly
Into your open arms.

Nine and Three-Quarters

I wrote this for my little brother, Nicky, as I was driving back from Nor Cal.

Right now we're on a long car-ride
And your arms are all scratched up
From holding your brand new kittens
You've always been irrepressible
And tough on the outside but
Sweet as cold summer's ice tea in that
Fragile, stubborn heart of yours
I'm holding back tears
Hoping the best for you,
Praying and praying
That you will grow
Confident and strong,
Bright and joyful
I don't know how to tell you
How much I love you;
There's only so much I can say
When you're only nine and three-quarters
But I hope one day
You will read these words
And know that I
Pray for the world for you,
I pray for the brightest and best and
For strength in the face of temptations and
Fierce convictions through the
Challenges that await
I love you, my brother,
Only nine and three-quarters
And if you ever fall down
Don't be afraid to
Stand up again,
Quick as you can

You are better than anyone could ever tell you.

Please, don't believe any less than that.

On a young Summer night.

he told her i was pretty
and i looked over
at a tall, shy boy
his light eyes
avoided mine
and i smiled up
at the summer sky
wishing i could say,

"you could be mine."

but instead, i was silent
and we looked away from each other
pretending there was nothing-
no hidden magic,
waiting to be stirred up
no secrets held
behind pressed, knit lips

just me,
smiling
at a tall, shy boy
on a young summer night.

Somewhere at the Intersection of Hope and Fear

Somewhere at the intersection of Hope and Fear
I walked slowly,
Afraid and excited
Unsure of each step forward
But refusing, still,
To go backwards
I asked you for a secret
And you sent me
A letter of broken notes
From a dusty piano
I'm unaware of the pieces of you
I should be holding onto
As I let go of myself
Close my eyes
And slip silently into still waters,
Green and warm
I'm not quite convinced
That drowning in this indecision
Is where I shall remain
Finally,
I stop chasing and
Freeze.

I notice my heartbeat-
Insistent and reassuring
And I hold your letter to the fire
As I watch it being swallowed
In the flames of
All the ways you did not care
And all the ways I stubbornly did.